Count the Cost

"Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. Won’t you first sit down and estimate the cost to see if you have enough money to complete it? For if you lay the foundation and are not able to finish it, everyone who sees it will ridicule you, saying, ‘This person began to build and wasn’t able to finish.’

“Or suppose a king is about to go to war against another king. Won’t he first sit down and consider whether he is able with ten thousand men to oppose the one coming against him with twenty thousand? If he is not able, he will send a delegation while the other is still a long way off and will ask for terms of peace. In the same way, those of you who do not give up everything you have cannot be my disciples.

Luke 14.

Tis a point I long to know;
Oft it causes anxious thought;
Do I love the Lord or no?
Am I his, or am I not?*

I realized that God does not care about the things I care about. He cares about me.

L

He gives and He takes away, and He makes us ask ourselves, did I truly ever love Him all this time? And do I love Him now, as He asks for or He pries from our hands the things that we really, really care about. 

I can see myself someday kneeling on the floor, burying my face in my hands at the remembrance of this post and all those prayers, because I was not even close to understanding the gravity of what Jesus requires. It's scary because this could happen anytime, yes, even as I speak. There are so many things that get in the way of God pouring into my life everything that He wants to - things that I am aware of and things that I am utterly blind to (I am blind to so many things, as the Spirit and the brothers and sisters who know me well can see), both the obvious idols and the things that I never would have imagined God whisking from me.
But He is Good. Maybe I don't fully understand what I'm saying, but I write this because I know it is true - I have seen and heard the testimony of saints who have gone through the furnace, and go through it again and again. He is in control. He is worthy and He is worth it. He empties us to fill us with something of infinitely more worth. He will carry out His eternal purpose of perfecting the bride and dwelling among His people, and may we never lose the vision (still so tiny in my mind) and the longing to see this come to fruition.

CCF, HCC, Brown, body of Christ, may we count the cost and encourage each other, from curious seeker to dormant church-goer to bright-eyed new believer to the ones weary from desert times, to do the same. And if we commit to Him, to commit to Him all the way. We have to persevere, as a body with all of its members. We have to live by faith and not by sight.


In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire —may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed.
1 Peter 1

*A stanza Charles Spurgeon included in his commentary on the Song of Solomon. Song of Songs always seemed like such a misfit in the Bible to me, to say the least. I'm only starting to sense how marvelously rich this book of the Bible is. It's come at such an apt time too.

ambition inspired by approval

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Apart from God, our quest for greatness is often a search for approval. I want to be applauded and esteemed. I live for praise. I attempt great things because I crave being celebrated. Selfish ambition is often a desperate quest for an earthly "Atta-boy", a drive to fashion a world that worships me.
The gospel brings me explosive news: my search for approval is over. In Christ I already have all the approval I need.
Because Christ's righteousness has been transferred to me, all the time and energy I once squandered trying to be liked or praised or to achieve something to validate my existence can now be redirected toward doing things for God's glory. I no longer live for approval; I live from approval.


Make no mistake. Sin is real, and we can sin away a lot of good stuff. Sin robs our joy in God. It's a delight-smasher. But sin never alters or reverses what Christ did upon the cross. It never causes God to withdraw his name or his acceptance from us.
So the rescue of godly ambition is now under way.
Do you struggle with the paralysis of analysis, unable to act boldly because you're wondering what people will think? Do you fear falling short of your goals or that God will somehow be displeased with you for not doing what he really wanted you to do?
You stand in the righteousness of Christ - and you possess all the approval you'll ever need. Don't spend another moment trying to be great in the eyes of men. Instead, be ambitious.


Eager to find out what Dave Harvey means by the last sentence.

Architecture and dship - the same task. Model it.

so why should I worry? why should I freak out? You know what I need

Model or no model, A+ or B-, my vintage joy is in Him.

may we be "wrecked" souls :D

I've been learning the difference between working with all my heart for men or for selfish gain and working with all my heart as if working for Him.
Now it's time to learn the difference between doing my best for Him and letting Christ work through me from the inside out.
The true meaning of His strength being made perfect in our weakness.

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Maybe it doesn't seem like marriage is happening anytime soon for us single kids. But here's one thing I'm learning for the here and now. All those things that Mom told us to do when we were little (or still does)..brush your teeth, do your laundry, eat your vegetables, sleep early, take care of your skin, get some exercise, show up on time...let's do these things for the sake of our future spouses if marriage is part of His plan for us. Regardless of whether or not we marry, let's take care of our bodies, let's work with what we have, not as a selfish pursuit, but a selfless one.. This is one I need a lot of help with - unhealthy habits galore here in college :P
Geoffrey Pittman, praise God for how He has been using your ministry!!

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If God took away everything that matters to you (career, reputation, comfort, fun, relationships (good or bad), even good things like mentors and visible fruit and a particular group of brothers and sisters, things that have really helped you grow), would He, just He Himself, still be enough for you? The more He takes these things away, in response to our prayers to help us follow Him closely, the more we realize how little we still trust Him, how little we actually know Him regardless of all our "Christian activity".
Do you really really believe that His will is for your greatest good, His greatest glory? Or are you afraid of loneliness, boredom, pain, the potential for your own sin? I am sometimes - maybe boredom especially. But God calls us to dive headfirst into the endless deep, instead of hanging onto the ledge at the 5-foot end. He says there is joy not only at the finish line, but in every step of the way. Let's help each other be courageous (cue Casting Crowns song haha).

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God has been so good to me this weekend, and it has definitely been Him. Don't have time to write about it (wanted to add 'sadly', but I realize even this is something God controls) - let's share in person reader!!